Babbittry. Look it up. Try a dictionary that isn’t on your phone. Not that there’ll be a picture of Oklahoma State Sen. David Holt (R-OKC), but there should be.
Holt appears to be the prime mover in attracting American Ninja Warrior to the Capitol grounds for a weekend taping, filming or digital processing du jour. The event, says Holt, will bring OKC fame and fortune, above and beyond what a small-market pro-basketball team and a minor-league baseball team and a river and — well, you know. Something else to keep us poor Okies from living in fly-over country.
The television show concerns contestants attempting to complete an obstacle course without falling in water or tearing their Spandex. Some fun, huh? Having the show here is not unlike having a Ferris wheel on the banks of our re-named river, although the wheel raises more questions: Wheel plus tornado equals rolling menace to what lies east-northeast.
The television crew is setting up on the south side of the Capitol; and, with luck, nothing will fall off the building during somebody’s daring plunge from one piece of moving foam rubber to another. With luck, our generic Indian will stay put atop the dome we just simply had to have because everybody else has one.
But kid yourself not. American Ninja Warrior gets up to $5 million in state tax credits, don’t you know; and all manner of people stand to be inconvenienced by 200 crewmen and a whole mess of vehicles in all the good parking spaces. Drive by and add to the spectacle. With luck, the weather won’t make everything slick and slippery.
According to Sen. Holt, Oklahoma has a “beautiful Capitol.” Of course, it is in considerable disrepair — inside and out — but so what?
Our state budget is in considerable disrepair also, and our legislators don’t seem too worried about that. Cut a few more vital programs and make a poor state poorer. By golly, we have no problems a few more tax credits won’t cure.
Perchance the television crew will get a good shot of the oil well on the Capitol grounds, so as to remind viewers of our undiversified economy.
My own preference would be to substitute our legislators for the contestants. And maybe Gov. Mary Fallin, too.
Just think: If she had show-biz credentials to go along with her vast political experience, she really could qualify as Donald Trump’s choice for Vice-President. She’s open to serving in that capacity already, and, given the evident level of conditioning among our legislators, she’d look better in Spandex and might get over a couple obstacles.
Or she could stop posturing. So could Sen. Holt. Neither one has the right idea.
And American Ninja Warrior won’t take us one baby step closer to solvency.